I’ve heard plenty of people say this to me and no one has been able to back it up. Drinks that attempt to hide the taste of alcohol would be better without alcohol in them in the first place.

Give me a fucking capri sun over a cocktail any day

I mean look, I don’t get any positive effects from drinking. Usually I just think “why did I pay for something expensive that tastes bad?” So maybe I’d change my tune if it actually made me feel happy or relaxed or whatever, but from a flavor standpoint alcohol just sucks.

Even if you liked the taste of alcohol look me dead in the eye and tell me it doesn’t clash flavor wise with basically everything. Bitter citrus flavors work okay and the same with juniper or other herbs like in gin, but seriously why do you even want to drink something that tastes like a tree in the first place?

Ah yes I want to drink the taste of bread but I prefer it when it has inescapable notes of literal poison and also the taste of the smell of weed (technically hops).

Ah yes gotta love that this other drink mostly just burns my throat but also has the subtle taste of wood. Gotta get the high end stuff though so that also has flavor notes that taste like a peat bog.

Here have some lemonade but worse. Don’t like that? how about this other cocktail that is peach lemonade (but also worse).

Do you know what else we should make worse? Chocolate milk. (Baileys)